NARCISSISTIC ABUSE

NARCISSISTIC ABUSE

Narcissistic abuse can leave deep emotional wounds that are difficult to name or explaining. Often, it’s not marked by visible harm, but by a slow erosion of your confidence, boundaries, and sense of self. You may have spent months or years doubting your own reality, feeling that no matter what you say or do, it’s never enough-or that the person hurting you always finds a way to make you feel at fault.

Whether this has occurred in a romantic relationship, within your family, or with a parent, colleague, or friend, narcissistic abuse can leave you feeling confused, anxious and disconnected from who you once were. Many people describe it as ‘losing themselves’ – a gradual unravelling of self-trust and inner peace.

Many people begin looking for help after searching for narcissistic abuse counselling near me, support after manipulation in Scunthorpe, or therapy for emotional control in North Lincolnshire – reaching out is a meaningful step towards healing.

Understanding What’s Happening

Narcissistic abuse is a pattern of emotional manipulation and control used by someone with strong narcissistic traits – often including a deep need for admiration, lack of empathy, and an inflated sense of self-importance. Over time, the person may use a range of behaviours to maintain power and control, such as:

Gaslighting: making you question your memory or perception, leaving you unsure what’s real.

Love-bombing: showering you with affection or attention to gain trust and dependancy.

Devaluation: suddenly withdrawing, criticising, or belittling you after gaining your trust.

Silent treatment or stonewalling: using emotional withdrawal as a form of punishment or control.

People who experience this kind of manipulation often describe feeling trapped in cycles of confusion, guilt, and self-blame. You may find yourself walking on eggshells, constantly analysing your words or actions to avoid conflict or criticism.

Understanding the Language of Survival

In the journey of healing from narcissistic abuse, you may come across certain terms that describe common experiences and coping strategies:

Grey Rock: a technique used to protect yourself emotionally by becoming as unresponsive and uninterested as possible when interacting with the abusive person – like a ‘grey rock.’ It helps reduce their control by giving them less emotional reaction to feed on.

Flying Monkeys: people (often friends, relatives or colleagues) that the narcissit manipulates to do their bidding – spreading their narrative, enforcing their control, or attacking your credibility. Recognising these dynamics can help you set firmer boundaries and see that the problem lies with the manipulation, not with you.

Hoovering: when the narcissistic person tries to ‘suck you back in’ after you’ve pulled away – through guilt, charm, or promises of change. Understanding this pattern helps you to spot it early and protect your emotional wellbeing.

Learning these terms can be empowering. They give words to what may once have felt like chaos – helping you to see patterns clearly and begin to rebuild your sense of control and self-trust.

Working Together to Heal

Recovery from narcissistic abuse takes time, patience, and compassion for yourself. In therapy, you will have space to unpack what has happened without judgement – to understand the psychological impact of manipulation and to rediscover your voice, confidence, and autonomy.

Together, we’ll work on helping you reconnect with your boundaries, strengthen your self-esteem, and rebuild the parts of yourself that may have been silenced or shamed. You’ll learn how to recognise unhealthy dynamics early, and how to protect yourself from being pulled back into old patterns.

Healing doesn’t mean forgetting what happened-it means reclaiming your pwoer, your eace, and your sense of self. You are not broken. What happened to you was real, and it is entirely possible to move from confusion and fear to clarity, strength, and freedom.

There is Hope

While trauma can leave lasting marks, it does not define you. With the right support, many people find their symptoms lessen, their bodies soften, and a sense of peace begins to return. Healing is not about reclaiming your life, your voice, and your sense of wholeness.

You do not have to fae trauma lone. Together, we can work towards helping you feel grounded, safe, and whole again – one gentle, supported step at a time.

Criteria to access this service

• If you are suffering with any of the above symptoms and you would like to do the work to make the changes you want.
• If you have a diagnosis.
• You do not need a referral from your G.P.
• You are welcome to go onto our therapist’s page and choose your therapist. You are able to go ahead and book an appointment on there.

Our privilege
It is our mission and our privilege to support you on your journey to recovery and to reach your goals. We are confident that together we can make a difference to your world and help you to live your life the way you want to live it. Imagine what your life would be like after therapy and the difference it would make to you. 

We help hundreds of people every year to be the best they can be. Please don’t suffer unnecessarily any longer, get in touch with us today and take the first step to make great things happen!

Narcissistic Abuse is trauma: it is treatable and recovery is possible.
Domestic abuse perpetrators are narcissistic, or at least, have narcissistic traits. Please also see our domestic violence page.

It can be very difficult, even dangerous, to leave an abusive relationship. If you would like help to leave please contact the excellent and specialist service:
The Blue Door
DN15 6LJ
Telephone (01724 841947 or 0800 1974 787
Email: Info@thebluedoor.org

Telephone 07907613600
Email info@greymatterscentre.co.uk

We offer specialist support for narcissistic abuse, emotional manipulation and recovery from controlling relationships across Scunthorpe, Ashby, Bottesford, Brigg, Crowle, Messingham, Winterton, Barton-upon-Humber and the wider North Lincolnshire community.